Moving to Assisted Living: Helping Your Parent Transition

Help your parents transition to assisted living.

Moving to assisted living can be an emotional and overwhelming experience for your parents. As a caregiver, it's important to be prepared and have a plan in place to ensure a smooth transition. In this post, we'll provide a detailed assisted living checklist to help you through the process of elderly relocation and adapting to a new living environment.

1. What documents do I need to prepare before moving to assisted living?

Before moving to assisted living, it's important to gather all the necessary documents your parent may need. This includes their medical records, insurance information, financial statements, and legal documents such as a power of attorney or living will. Talk to an Elder Law Attorney to make sure everything is in place. Additionally, the assisted living community you choose may have a list of documents they will need from you. Make sure you have everything before moving day. You will want that day to be as stress free as you can make it.

2. What should I look for when choosing an assisted living facility?

When choosing an assisted living facility, it's important to consider the location, cost, amenities, and level of care provided. Additionally, you should visit the facility in person to assess the cleanliness, safety, and overall atmosphere.

Remember, you are purchasing care not decor. While you want the surroundings to be clean and pleasant looking the most important thing is the care that is given.

Spend time in the assisted living community. Ask is you can have lunch with the residents or just hang out with them in the afternoon.

Observe and notice.

This is the most important part of moving to assisted living. 

Are the caregivers responsive to the residents’ needs and wants? Do the caregivers seem happy? What are they eating for lunch? Is there help available to assist if needed? Are there any activities going on? Remember watching television can be an activity if the residents are engaged. Watching your favorite soap opera or a ball game can stimulate conversation. But if the residents are simply parked in front of the television and no one seems to know what they are even watching that could be a red flag.

3. How can I help my parent adapt to their new living environment?

Moving to a new living environment can be challenging for anyone, especially for the elderly. To help your parent adapt, encourage them to decorate their new space and make it feel like home. In fact there are companies that specialize in moving seniors to assisted living. They try to recreate their space to look as much like the home they moved from.

Additionally, you can help them get involved in activities and social events at the facility to help them make new friends and feel more comfortable. It is also important to make sure they know you have not abandoned them. A nightly call or better yet a video call to say good night can ease their mind. Moving to assisted living doesn’t have to be stressful.

4. What are some common challenges that may arise during the transition?

During the transition to assisted living, it's common for both the caregiver and parent to experience a range of emotions. Your parent may feel anxious or sad about leaving their home, while you may feel guilty or overwhelmed. It's important to communicate openly with each other and seek support from family, friends, or a therapist if needed.

If dementia is part of the picture there may also need to be changes in how you approach this transition.

Families often approach the decision from a logical perspective, which doesn't work well with dementia. The frontal lobe (involved in logic and reasoning) is often impaired in those with dementia, making emotional communication more effective. Caregivers often face resistance from their elderly parents or spouses due to their primal brain kicking in, triggering fight or flight response. 

Parents/spouses with dementia may not process or comprehend lengthy explanations due to cognitive change. To help communicate with elderly parents/spouses with dementia, Dementia Coach Lee Mohler suggests approaching with more emotion and rephrase things simply. She suggests giving compliments/statements that have meaning for the person. This three-step process is called "emotional bridging," which involves connecting, anchoring, and offering.

Conclusion

Moving a parent to an assisted living facility can be a difficult decision, but with the right preparation and support, it can also be a positive experience. By following this assisted living checklist and taking the time to help your parents adapt to their new living environment, you can ensure a smooth transition and peace of mind for everyone involved.

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